i post this every year, but this years version is different. better. more bittersweet.

The Things We Think and Do Not Say

As my entire college career lies in my wake and an uncertain future lies ahead, now is the time for yours truly to take a short time to remember and reflect.

All throughout grade school, I remember the last day of classes as a yearly event of unparalleled joy. The only thing anyone could think about was the endless summer. The next school year seemed like it would never come. College? Getting a job? The rest of you life? Only an eternity away, not worth worrying about now. However, in college that same last day of classes is different. One might never think that a party that starts at 3 pm on a Friday afternoon could in any way be bittersweet, but you would be wrong. The very reason why we drink with the sun on our backs, the reason we sing "Freebird" at the top of our lungs, arm in arm with our closest friends on the front lawn of a frat party, is not because we are happy that the school year is over, but because we realize that the rest of our lives is one year closer. We are scared because we finally comprehend that these years, the years that we live our lives and our youth to the fullest, the best years of our lives, are slowly but surely coming to a close. That is the reason why we drown our misty-eyed happiness at the bottom of a bottle. We smile, we sing, we cry, but we will never be the same.

This realization is useless unless each of us learns, for better or worse, from our earth's most recent trip around the sun. Each person reading this rant is not the same individual he or she was at this time last year. We have fallen in and out of love, slept through classes, ingested copious amounts of alcohol and encouraged others to do the same. We have sung, danced, fought, talked, walked, run, and ate. Many times all of these happened in the same day. We grow, we build relationships, we fall, we get back up, and in the end, we are better people simply because we made it through the ups and downs.

This year has taught yours truly a great deal. I've had the best times of my life, most involving alcohol, loud music, and loose women. Highlights include Novemberfest (a 621 production), Halloween, Puerto Vallarta, BLACKOUT featuring Tyler Hansborough (another 621 production) and all the lovely, lovely ladies in between. But, as with all things in this world, the good came with the bad and the ugly. I learned what real friendship is, and who my real friends are. Almost at the same time, I learned to recognize who could persevere through life's lemons, and who will need a lifetime of therapy to get over their sheltered youth. I can tell you with no ego that I am not bitter toward any of the people who taught me these things. In fact, I am glad I ran into them now so I can avoid them in the future. As cliche as it sounds, when life hands you lemons, make lemonade, mix it with vodka, and drink a lot of it.

i dont know how things are going to be. in about a week, this so called life called college will be done. like at the end of goodfellas when ray liotta goes from the gangsta life to the middle of suburbia and he is bored to tears. After all my reminiscing is done, I know that remembering is only helpful in moderation. Don't worry about the future, for it has yet to come. Forget about the past, for the past is done. Only care about today, because today is day one.

Enjoy the endless summer everyone, wherever it may take you. Never forget that the future is bright.

Hugs and handpounds.