mobert and friends volume two. read on.

this is jane. jane used to work and an upscale clothiere at the mall called baby gap or something like that. she bought all her clothes there and thought she was real hot shit when she wore them. one day, we were both wearing jeans from her store and she noticed.

hey! i like your jeans! are they baby gap?

sure are, better than yours though.

what?! mine are baby gap too.

paid too much for them though.

umm, hello. employee discount.

umm hello. swap meet.

damn, good point.

the first time we hung out (not wearing baby gap jeans), we watched the sixth sense starring bruce willis and haley joel osment (remember him?) i proclaimed i had never seen it and she punched me in the face. she was surprised and in total disbelief that anyone on the planet earth would have never seen such a fine movie. even if mister em night is a formulaic racist suburban hack. it was pretty much the only choice though, cuz the only fine films she had were dont be a menace and beverly hills cop three.

jane told me to leave out the part about that night where she told me to come over to her place at 11 pm and she had already put away a bottle of five dollar wine. i told her yeah sure thing, itll be our little secret, no one will ever know.

har har, fat chance.

when i got home i was tired, but i wrote this in my other, secret blog:

she told me about how when she met me at that party over the summer and asked me for a cigarette that she was really drunk and doesnt usually smoke.

i said thats surprising, because youre body usually does.

she smiled. you know i really have class in a few hours.

and for a moment, the next day, walking through the new season on that crisp first day of spring, cool and dry with a sprinkle of march breeze, for the first time in a long time, it wasnt so bad.